End of October is, traditionally, not the time of the year to retrospect. But, strangely, for the past hour or so, I have become rather overwhelmingly aware of the fact that 2016 has, so far, been rather good to me.
And boy! What a wonderful feeling that is!!!
And then, simultaneously with this awareness, came an overwhelming desire to write and share this thought on the blog.
The fact that I have not blogged in a long time, is a thorn in my flesh. This, in fact, is a major blot on my above said contentment.
I WANT to write.
There are things that I want to say.
There are things, I feel, I MUST say.
And yet, whenever I thought of blogging, it was always in the future tense.
“I AM going to write, have no fear”, I would tell myself. “As soon as I finish reading this stack of books because they are due at the library next week. And I’ll be darned if I return these unread!!” Or I would say “after I finish knitting my current project, because, you see, it is URGENT!” As it turned out, SOMETHING or the other always, but ALWAYS, took precedence over writing. Basically, because writing is not easy for me. I am not readily given to expressing my thought. In other words, I did not particularly, enjoy expressing my opinions. Not because of an absence of thought. But, because as soon as I have thought a thought, I have already experienced it. Writing it out and even speaking and discussing it means just spending more time on the same instead of experiencing something new!
Now ironicallyThese aforementioned “new experiences”that I have gained at the expense of writing, have changed my opinion about writing.I I have realised the value of interaction of thoughts and ideas. So, to me now, the expression of ideas, however inane and time consuming, is becoming increasingly coveted.
No wonder then, that as soon as I felt that I should share this feeling of contentment on the blog, I decided that I must act on it. So, that’s the reason for this post.
But, now, to the initial feeling that prompted this post.
This evening, I was feeling rather vanquished by the clutter monster.
For the past 6 months or so, I have waged a concerted and protracted battle against clutter in my home.
Being a minimalist at heart, I get upset by too much stuff in the house. So, I sat down to systematically exterminate clutter. And as Diwali approached, I intensified my efforts to de-clutter every nook and cranny of my house. But now that diwali has come and gone, I just sat down to review the progress, and I had to admit that the things are still far from my vision. This, frankly,was a rather tiresome realisation because not only do I NOT enjoy decluttering and organising stuff around the house, I would rather spend that time reading or knitting or even doodling. Decluttering was just a means to the end of increasing my overall productivity. In an organized environment, I would get to spend more time reading/knitting/doodling. But now I am running out of stem as I was physically getting tired of the all the work involved. So, I was feeling rather pensive this evening and about to give up the effort and just let the things be.
And then, in a moment , my perspective did an about turn.
Suddenly,instead of seeing all that still needs to be done, I saw clearly, how FAR I have come! I realised that the scenario today is, definitely, less than ideal But 6 months back, it was so much worse and I truely deserve a pat on the back for having come this far.
This blog post is that well deserved pat.
Not just for taming the clutter monster, but also for knitting more, reading more, exercising more, meditating more. And as this blog post is nearing completion, dare I add, “blogging more” to this list
“Oh yes , you could”, said the tamer of the clutter-monster presently, poised and confident to tackle the blogging-monster as well.