This is usually where most fairytales end… conjuring up an image that all of us can relate to. The Prince and Princess marry and begin their new life together. And as they ride off into the sunset, we presume that they are drifting off into a life of eternal bliss…. to a life full of promise, romance and love.
I have been riding this roller coaster of agony and ecstasy called married life for 13 years now. Although I am usually surprised at how good life can be. At times, I find reality hard to deal with.
Marriage does manage to throw up a few surprises at you. Being married to someone does not mean that you will ‘feel’ as if you’re in love every day. My husband and I enjoy each other’s company. We laugh together, tease each other and smile at each other. But we don’t necessarily agree on everything. There have been times when we have felt very lonely indeed. We still have to make an effort to spend quality time together.
Manageable?…. Most of the time.
Ogden Nash said, “One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.”
Perhaps there is a grain of truth to it or maybe we should severely criticize him for saying this
Marriage is fun! Like sugar and spice … Like the trinkets and bells….. it can make our heart flutter every once in a while. It is a wonderful adventure where the highs are as exhilarating as the lows are depleting. Somewhere in the orbit of this pendulum swing, each of us will find a space that is perfect for ourselves, a space of stability, certainty and joy, where we can live happily together with our partners. Yes, there is the serious side of life to deal with, but we don’t let it consume our thoughts and time. It can be a joyful experience that need not fade away.
Fairytales gave me the idea of lifetime love and romance and the belief that it is indeed possible to live happily ever after. But they usually end abruptly after the wedding and leave us truly dangling.
“Happily ever after” is only the beginning….